Dialogues / Comedy
Reply All
Priya sent an email mocking her manager to the entire company by mistake. Now she has been called into Jordan's office. She is ready to be fired. Jordan has a different problem.
A small glass-walled office. JORDAN sits behind a desk, laptop open, unusually still. PRIYA knocks and enters, holding her phone like evidence.
PRIYA
You wanted to see me.
JORDAN
Sit down, Priya.
PRIYA
I'd rather stand. It feels more honest.
JORDAN
Sit down.
She sits.
JORDAN
At nine forty-two this morning, an email went out to the whole company. Subject line: "the voice is back".
PRIYA
Yes.
JORDAN
Two hundred eleven people.
PRIYA
Two hundred twelve. Facilities has a shared inbox.
JORDAN
Thank you.
PRIYA
It was meant for Dev. You have to believe me. Dev and I have a running thing about the voice.
JORDAN
What voice?
PRIYA
The one you do in the Monday meeting when you're about to say something is "not a big deal".
JORDAN
I don't do a voice.
PRIYA
(the voice)
"It's not a big deal, guys."
Pause.
JORDAN
Okay.
PRIYA
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'll write an apology. To everyone. I'll do it in the voice if you want.
JORDAN
Please don't.
PRIYA
Am I fired?
JORDAN
No.
PRIYA
Am I getting moved to Facilities?
JORDAN
No. Priya, I need you to look at something and I need you to stay calm.
Jordan turns the laptop around. Priya reads.
PRIYA
Oh.
JORDAN
Yes.
PRIYA
Oh no.
JORDAN
Yes.
PRIYA
You replied all.
JORDAN
I replied all.
PRIYA
You replied all to my reply all. And you wrote...
(reading)
"Honestly she's not wrong, but if HR sees this I'm done, delete delete delete."
JORDAN
I was trying to forward it to my partner.
PRIYA
Why would you forward it to your partner?
JORDAN
They think the voice is funny.
PRIYA
So there is a voice.
JORDAN
Priya.
PRIYA
There's a voice and your partner knows about the voice.
JORDAN
Focus. You're on Dev's team. Dev knows how to recall things. I've heard him say "recall" in a sentence.
PRIYA
You can't recall it. It's been eleven minutes. Karen in Accounting already printed it.
JORDAN
How do you know that?
PRIYA
She prints everything. It's a cry for help.
Jordan puts both hands flat on the desk.
JORDAN
What would you do?
PRIYA
Me?
JORDAN
You have eleven more minutes of experience with this than I do.
PRIYA
(slowly starting to enjoy this)
Okay. First, you stop saying "delete delete delete" out loud. You're doing it right now.
JORDAN
Sorry.
PRIYA
Second. You go out there and you own it. Big. Bigger than the email.
JORDAN
How big?
PRIYA
You do the voice. On purpose. In the break room. At eleven, when everyone's getting coffee.
JORDAN
I can't.
PRIYA
Then Karen frames it.
Long pause.
JORDAN
(the voice, terribly)
"It's not a big deal, guys."
PRIYA
Lower. You go lower on "guys".
JORDAN
(lower)
"Guys."
PRIYA
There it is.
JORDAN
I hate this.
PRIYA
I know. Same time tomorrow?
She stands. Leaves. Jordan practices the voice alone.
End of script
You might also read
Step Seven
It is 2 a.m. and Priya and Kels are building a bookshelf with instructions that clearly belong to something else. Kels insists on finishing tonight. Priya starts to wonder why her roommate suddenly cares so much about furniture.
Platefull Roommate Standoff
Platefull is a meal kit with pre-chopped ingredients and three-step cards. Two roommates argue over whose night it is to cook until the box on the doorstep settles it. Fast overlapping banter, then a small truce at the stove.
Thirty Minute Sync
Diane has to lay off the best person on her team. Jordan read the calendar invite and figured it out before walking in. Jordan has questions, and Diane owes real answers.
One Seat Left
A failing orbital station has eleven hours of air and one suit for the last shuttle down. Hale has flown that shuttle for fourteen years. Quinn built the casing that bought them the eleven hours. The committee has sent Quinn to talk to him.